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ALL GREETING CARDS

Our entire greeting card range, laid bare for your pleasure.

If you fancy adding a gift to your purchase, why not shop our rude stationary or funny wrapping paper for the full insulting experience.


Available Options

* Custom card *

Product Code: CSTM1

£3.99 Ex Tax:£3.33
You think it, we'll print it.
You think it, we'll print..
£3.99 Ex Tax:£3.33

50 shades of gay

Product Code: LGBT009

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

For that friend who is all types of homosexual.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an addition coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


For that friend who is al..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

A new baby! Are you sure it's his?

Product Code: BBS004

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

I feel a DNA test is in order.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an addition coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


I feel a DNA test is in o..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

A new baby! Your poor vagina

Product Code: BBS001

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Need we say more...

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an addition coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Need we say more...SIZE: ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Arcade birthday wanker

Product Code: AG001

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Stop tugging that joystick for 2 minutes and appreciate this fucking card!

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an addition coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Stop tugging that joystic..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Attention seeking wanker

Product Code: INSLT002

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

For that friend that makes it all about them.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an addition coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.

For that friend that make..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Bald cunt

Product Code: CR004

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

You're bald. You're a cunt.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


You're bald. You're a cun..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Available Options

Beautiful bastard

Product Code: V3

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49
Just look at you, you hunk.
Just look at you, you hun..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Birthday cunt

Product Code: CR002

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

It's your birthday. You're a cunt.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


It's your birthday. You'r..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Birthday wanker

Product Code: WR005

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Wahey, it's your birthday. Doesn't stop you being a wanker.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Wahey, it's your birthday..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

BITCH

Product Code: BAW020

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

There always one friend with a face like a slapped arse.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


There always one friend w..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Bon voyage tosser

Product Code: FW003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

See ya pal, don't let the door knock your fat ass on the way out.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


See ya pal, don't let the..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Boobie invaders

Product Code: AG002

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

We're adults now, we want to shoot on something else...

We're adults now, we want..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

C / U / N / T

Product Code: INSLT003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

A softer way to tell your friends what you think of them.

A softer way to tell your..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Can we tell people you're gay yet?

Product Code: LGBT001

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

C'mon! You know. We know. Let's just have a coming out party.

C'mon! You know. We know...
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Cheeky finger blast?

Product Code: MISC004

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fingering is under rated and we're bringing it back.

Fingering is under rated ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Available Options

Cheeky threesome?

Product Code: V2

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49
2 is company, 3 is a shag.


2 is company, 3 is a shag..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Clam lapper

Product Code: LGBT003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Some girls just like to lick fanny.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Some girls just like to l..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Cluster fuck

Product Code: BAW007

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Who comes to mind for this card?

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Who comes to mind for thi..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Cock breath

Product Code: LGBT011

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Your breath smells a bit like.... COCK

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.



Your breath smells a bit ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Cock gobbler

Product Code: BAW003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Does your mate get home at 4am after stuffing her face with chode all night? She sounds like a cock gobbler.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Does your mate get home a..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Colour me in CUNT

Product Code: MISC006

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Extra points if you can keep it in the lines.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Extra points if you can k..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Congratulations on getting engaged you daft pair of cunts

Product Code: WED003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

What have you done you silly people!

What have you done you si..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Cum whore

Product Code: BAW004

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Some people are just mad for it. Bukake anyone...?

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Some people are just mad ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

CUNT

Product Code: INSLT009

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Who's a cunt?     --> THIS GUY <--

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.

Who's a cunt?  ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

CUNT

Product Code: BAW015

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Not for the faint-hearted.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Not for the faint-hearted..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

CUNT typography

Product Code: INSLT006

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Don't let the pretty colours distract you, it's still offensive.

Don't let the pretty colo..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Dick muncher

Product Code: BAW008

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

We're not judging.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


We're not judging.SIZE: A..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Engaged! He finally grew some fucking balls

Product Code: WED002

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

About fucking time, we've been waiting long enough.

About fucking time, we've..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fabulous fanny

Product Code: MISC005

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Some fannies can only be described as fabulous.

Some fannies can only be ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Available Options

Fancy a shag?

Product Code: V1

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49
Don't ask, don't get.


Don't ask, don't get...
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fat cunt

Product Code: CR010

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

You're fat. You're a cunt.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


You're fat. You're a cunt..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fitness wanker

Product Code: WR006

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

You already know who you're getting this for. That person always clogging up your news feed...

#instafitness

#instawanker

#instafuckoff

You already know who you'..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fridge magnet cunt

Product Code: HB003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Admit it, we've all done this to our fridge at some point.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Admit it, we've all done ..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fuck nuts

Product Code: BAW010

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

It can be said endearingly, although we did mean it as an insult.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


It can be said endearingl..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fuck, I thought you'd already left

Product Code: FW003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Oh crap, you're still here! My bad.

Oh crap, you're still her..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fucktard

Product Code: INSLT010

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fucktard: Noun - a contemptible or stupid person.

Fucktard: Noun - a contem..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Fudge packer

Product Code: LGBT004

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

These guys work their arses off, but you'll only ever see them come in the back door.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


These guys work their ars..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Gay and gothic

Product Code: LGBT008

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Not everything gay involves rainbows.

SIZE: A6 (105mm x 148mm)

Includes an additional coloured envelope and The Cunning Linguist wax seal, for that extra touch.


Not everything gay involv..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

Get well soon / deepest sympathies

Product Code: GWS003

£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49

The thought was there, you're just too late.

The thought was there, yo..
£2.99 Ex Tax:£2.49
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